Preemptive Offenses

Friday, March 15, 2013

From The Too-Good-To-Be-True Files

If this isn't a parody or prank of some sort, Obama will be living it down for the rest of his term in the White House:

WASHINGTON — Following President Obama’s lunch meeting with Senate Republicans on Capitol Hill, Maine Republican Senator Susan Collins described the food served and said the president was not able to eat since his “taster” was not present.

“University of Maine recipe for healthy lobster salad — I pointed that out to the president in keeping with the first lady’s initiatives and Fox Family Potato Chips made in Aroostook County where I’m from and wild blueberry pie full of anti-oxidants, see this was a healthy lunch as well. We did have a little ice cream on the pie too, also made in Maine, Gifford’s Ice Cream. So in all seriousness this was well received,” Collins told reporters on Thursday after the meeting at the Capitol.

“Unfortunately, you know, the president can’t,” said Collins when asked if Obama ate at the lunch meeting. “He looked longingly at it,” Collins continued. “He honestly did look longingly at it, but apparently he has to have essentially a taster, and I pointed out to him that we were all tasters for him, that if the food had been poisoned all of us would have keeled over so, but he did look longingly at it and he remarked that we have far better food than the Democrats do, and I said that was because I was hosting.”

So old Joltin' Joe Biden as VP isn't enough life insurance, Mr. President? You can't sit to a confab with your political adversaries and eat what they do without your taster?

Actually, the very existence of such a functionary is a bit puzzling. Who is he? Where did they find him? Is he Secret Service, or unaffiliated with that agency? And what makes him willing to die by poisoning for the president of the United States Barack Hussein Obama?

Always assuming that there's even the least possibility that the Republicans would dream of risking as much as a femtosecond with Joe Biden's itchy-twitchy fingers hovering over the Big Red Button, of course. I think that would give them nightmares intense enough to kill. Even the RINOs.

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